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Three’s Company…Our Future Depends On it
In the seventh grade I bought my first thong. It was baby pink, sheer, and wearing it made me feel like a stripper. Of course at this time my only experience with strippers was that cheesy Demi Moore...
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Tommy Lee Sex Tapes And Broken Hearts
My obsession with excess started at a young age. While other girls swooned over The Backstreet Boys, my adolescent desire secretly hungered for the likes of Tommy Lee. Hockey hair repulsed me, blue...
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…And Sometimes You Need Your Mom To Make It All Okay
Every once in a while there is an occurrence that makes you take a moment to re-evaluate your place in society. My superiority complex usually safeguards me from feeling like a piece of trash in the...
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When You Said There Would Be Tall Boys, I Thought You Meant PBR
The first time I went to a nightclub was in the tenth grade. It was all ages (aka creepy dude) night at Club 108 and I wore Brazilian cut low-rise jeans and a hot top with a pair of Nike Air Force...
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Dungeons and Dragons: Hometown Homeboys Edition
“It happened again…” Last night I sat with a bunch of ladies and candidly discussed the ins and outs of casual sex. Over pitchers, wings and a whole lot of “American style cheese” (aka…liquid lard) we...
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Take Off Your Pants And Jacket
I put away my winter jacket for the season, and this time I mean business. I may have been jumping the gun as I spent the Monday evening defrosting my toes after insisting that park hangs and tall...
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What’s Your Brother’s Name?
The seventh grade opened up a whole new world. I made friends outside of my comfort zone and would soon find myself spending my summer poolside with the “rich” kids who occupied Trelawny Circle. The...
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Getting Older, Being Broke And Finding My Inner Submissive: Part I
I think I have officially kicked-off my quarter-life-crises. I more often than not contemplate cutting off all my hair (yet again), find it imperative that my evening bath ritual be performed with...
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